Civility…
Do you take the time to smile at people when you pass them in the hall, and say “hello” to those you work with? Do you show respect and kindness in all of your personal and online interactions?
If you do that’s wonderful, but unfortunately, it’s rare. According to the 2016 Civility Survey, 95 percent of people think we have a civility problem in America.
It’s also disheartening to know that 40 percent of people think that “nice guys finish last”, and that they can’t be nice if they want others to respect them. This can’t be more wrong! In fact, being uncivil to others costs you status, power, and advancement, and when you show kindness and respect, you are viewed as being a better leader and more competent at your job.
In Christine Porath’s new book, “Mastering Civility,” she shares groundbreaking research that proves the unwavering connection between having the ability to lift people up (being civil and polite to others) to being personally more successful and increasing corporate profits.
The fundamentals of civility and having polite etiquette are simple, and easy to pass along to our children.
SAY PLEASE AND THANK YOU
People will be more inclined to trust you, follow you, and support you when you use the “magic words.”
SMILE
Use it to build rapport, put people at ease, and inspire others. We appear more likable and courteous and are perceived as more competent when we smile. It also has the power to make others more effective.
BUILD RELATIONSHIPS
The Center for Creative Leadership found that the most successful executives have positive relationships with their subordinates. Reach out to people and get to know those whom you work with, those on your floor, the security guard, and others whom you see everyday. Remember that your children are watching your interactions.
LISTNIt signals caring, commitment and connection. We don’t connect by passively hearing. Make eye contact. Ask clarifying questions. Don’t text or be online when talking with others in person. And listen to your children. Take time to put down your phone or tablet when they have questions and want to talk.
“Get the fundamentals down and the level of everything you do will rise.” – Michael Jordan
Civility Isn’t Just for the Workplace
It’s also critical that we raise polite and respectful children. One of the most effective ways to do this is to role model for our children how to behave in a civil and polite way.
Not being rude isn’t the same as being civil.
Let’s say you see an elderly person putting groceries in her car. Not being rude is that you would not say something mean to her. But, being civil and a great role model for your kids, would be to ask if you could help her load the bags into her car. It’s things you can do in simple ways to show others respect and kindness.
Also, after teaching your children how to show respect and kindness to adults and peers, recognize and praise them when they do something well.
For more information about business and social etiquette please go to my website FinesseWorldwide.com
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